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The mechanical sharks from the first Jaws movie were made from chicken wire covered in edam. The prototype sank on its first test and ws eaten by a hungry shoal of sardines.
In the outbacks of Australia, in the desert of Dubai and in the underwater ice caves of Alaska there are cheese tribes who will one day take over the world and make your children speak cheese.
Cheese is a great conductor of electricity and has been used to join pieces of wire together. if the cheese is touched however a shock will be incurred. a wooden box is advisable if this is to be done.
Due to its high ceramide content, cheese inhibits the healthy growth of sperm. This is why the number of cheese lovers has been falling, decade on decade, since the invention of cheese in Elizabethan times.
Spread some festive joy by singing songs such as "Good King Wensleydale last looked out on the feast of cheesen" to your colleagues.
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Cheesy tune wanted as 'national anthem' for UK Cheddar
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