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Whilst it's a lesser known fact that "Sir" Cliff Richard and Rod Stewart both wear colostomy bags, almost EVERYONE knows that Bruce Forsythe's chin is in fact made of loose, crumbly Cheshire. Astounding.
Even a few gramms of 'Stinking Bishop' will overpower the scent from the perfume section of Boots
You can easily have fun confusing other motorists by replacing the orange indicator lamps in your car with small blocks of red leicester. However, if you cause a car to crash on the A4 at the Slough interchange, you can expect a £500 fine and 6 points.
Pilgrim's Choice is a pilgrim's cheddar of choice
Miss Manners advises that all cheese served at a dinner party be presliced, so as to prevent it from being cut at the table.
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- Twice Brewed - Where that scene from Robin Hood was filmed.
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Once attractive pop princess but now loony knickerless tart Britney Spears has cut all her hair off in a tantrum because her favourite cheesemonger was all out of best mature cheddar. If she made a bit of an effort then she'd be welcome to share my cheese
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