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cheese is an existential construct and does not actually have any basis in the physical world
The famous Iranian cheese "Hostage" was today discovered to be nothing more than nuclear ccurds after its burka was forcibly removed for its driving licence foto.
In the Middle Ages strands of locally produced cheese were woven into vests which were both warm and provided a tasty cheesy snack when times were hard
"Cheese" is a form of Haiku in some Japanese provinces.
Wacky illusionist David Blaine claims that he doesn’t eat cheese on the grounds that dairy produce reduces his magical powers. Well I say up yours git wizard, all the more for me!
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random cheese fact
Statistically you are more likely to die from cheese or cheese related illnesses than you are to die whilst crossing the road. So remember!.. look both ways before eating your cheese!
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